Having Less Thoughts About More Things Reduces Suffering
“I am trying to have less thoughts about more things”, said one of the men I am coaching.
After years of telling himself stories, labeling, judging, assuming and assigning meaning to things, he now sees that all those thoughts are not on the outside of him. They all originate on the inside of him and those thoughts, that mental noise, spurs feelings in him that drives him to act in ways that feeds his anxiety, fear, shame, insecurity, and pain.
His thoughts, feelings, and actions damage his relationships and disconnects him from others and keeps him feeling lonely and unloved.
Awakening from this mental hell is part of every man’s journey from unconscious to conscious, from asleep to awake, from zombie to fully present and alive. We all must awaken from the dream and choose to have less thoughts about more things.
When we do, we realize that in any given moment, we are okay. We may not like what is going on around us. We may decide to make a different choice for ourselves. But we know that ultimately we are separate from our thoughts and that when our thinking is running rampant then we are no longer using our thinking to create, but rather our thinking is using us.
The first step in reclaiming our personal power is to recognize that we are not our thoughts and that most of the time we are reacting to our thoughts without even stopping to challenge those thoughts.
Our brain serves up a thought, we react to the thought with fear, anxiety, shame, insecurity, or some other feeling and then we act out with the goal of making our discomfort go away.
Instead we must practice becoming aware of our thinking, that we are telling ourself a story, that our brain is generating thoughts, but those thoughts are not us.
When we become aware of our thoughts, then we can examine those thoughts.
We can ask, “What am I thinking right now”, “Where did that thought come from”, “Why am I thinking that thought”, “Is that thought even true”, “What is the thought behind that thought”, “Does thinking this thought serve me”.
A useful book that helps with this understanding and practice is Addicted To The Monkey Mind by J.F. Benoist. In the book he points some of the things I mentioned here as well as advice for recognizing when we are experiencing the false reality of our thoughts instead of being fully present in this moment, separate from our thoughts.
Also, here is an excellent talk by Eckhart Tolle where he talks about being you above the level of thought that I find very useful for understanding how we are separate from our thoughts and when we make a conscious choice to have less thoughts about more things, we free ourselves from our self induced suffering.
Are you having a hard time getting a handle on your run away thoughts? Do you want a quieter brain and less anxiety? I had this same issue and I learned how to realize when I was being sucked into the drama of my thinking and I learned how to have thoughts about my thoughts. I can help you learn how to do the same thing.
Contact me to set up a free phone call to talk about getting you on the path to peace of mind, more confidence, and less thinking about more things.
Happy Man Coach & Freedom Fighter
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio